Complicated
by Longing for Oblivion
Summary: 'I love you...' He whispered softly, looking at Angell who was lying deep asleep in his arms. He treasured those moments, knowing that he could never tell her those words when she could hear them. Real summary inside.
1. A nightmare coming true

_**Discs.:**__I don't own CSI NY nor its characters - I just borrow them for fun..._

_**Summary:**__From pretty much the first day Mac had felt drawn to Angell, but he kept pushing those feelings away, trying hard to ignore the way he feels for her. However, when Flack gets seriously injured during a raid gone terribly wrong and Angell goes through hell Mac's self-control gets put to the test._

_**Pairing:**__Even though Angell will be with Mac for a while this is nonetheless a Flangell story! (Just to clear that right from the start)_

_**Genres:**__Drama, Angst, Tragedy, Hurt/Comfort, Romance_

_**Warnings:**__Character near death, and some minor things like language and OOC behavior - dunno yet, but I'll let ya know as the stuff comes up..._

_**A/N:**__Well, this story has been on my mind now for a felt eternity, but for certain reasons I didn't start with writing it - until now that is..._

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**Complicated**

_1. A nightmare coming true_

Angell couldn't help but smile as she checked once more the time. If she didn't get stuck in some traffic-jam she would be home in about forty minutes and she simply couldn't wait to see Flack. Sure, she had enjoyed her week away from work, but she simply had missed him so much - not that she would ever admit that she had basically thought about him non-stop...

She shook softly her head, already wondering what they could do that evening. However, only a moment later she was disturbed in her thoughts as her cell phone began ringing. After grabbing the item from the passenger-seat she quickly answered the call, not bothering to check the caller's ID first.

"Angell."

_"Hey, it's me..." _She heard Stella's voice on the other end of the line,

_"Listen, are you already on the way back?"_

"Yes..." Angell stated and couldn't help but smile at the thought that they apparently couldn't even do without her for a week,

"Why are ya asking?"

_"Do you know when you will arrive in New York?" _Stella inquired.

At that her smile faded, suddenly beginning to doubt that this was about work.

"I'm almost back in the city." She said hesitantly, feeling a lump forming in her throat, there had been something in the CSI's voice that put her on edge,

"What's the matter?"

She heard Stella take a deep breath on the other end of the line, causing her heart to beat faster as she got more and more the feeling that whatever the reason for this call had been, it had to be something bad. Eventually the CSI suggested,

_"You should better pull over if you're currently driving..."_

"Stella, what's wrong?" Angell asked right away, not even thinking about stopping. As the CSI didn't reply she demanded,

"I wanna know what's wrong - now!"

_"It's Flack, Angell, he was injured during a raid..." _Stella started, but trailed off as she heard over the phone how Angell slammed on the brakes.

"Is he okay?" Angell asked barely above a whisper. She felt like she couldn't breathe, there were tears burning at the back of her eyes, but she refused to cry - she just couldn't lose her composure right now, she had to stay focused...

_"We don't know...They just brought him to a hospital..." _Stella told her.

"I...I'm on my way..." She forced herself to speak up again and closed for a moment her eyes as the CSI told her the name and address of the hospital, eventually she said,

"I'll be there as soon as I can..." Instead of waiting for Stella's reply she simply hung up and started driving again.

_Meanwhile in New York :_

Hanging up the phone Stella let out a heavy sigh, somehow being worried about Angell. Taking a look around she couldn't help but let her shoulders hang and got momentarily lost in her thoughts.

"Did you already reach Angell?" Mac's voice interrupted her thoughts and she turned to look at him.

Nodding slightly she replied,

"She's already on the way..."

As she trailed off they both looked at the burning warehouse in front of them. The fire department had arrived five minutes earlier, just as the ambulance had taken off with Flack - and they were still far from in control of the fire.

"How did she take it?" Mac broke eventually the silence between them.

Stella thought for a moment, then she looked at him and stated,

"Probably not too well, but it's hard to judge without seeing her. However, I chose to leave it at the fact that Flack has been injured." Seeing the surprise on Mac's face Stella pointed out,

"I didn't want to tell her over the phone..."

Mac nodded slightly and looked once again at the building in front of them. Noticing that he was deeply lost in thought Stella spoke up once more,

"Brings back old memories, doesn't it?"

At that he snapped out of his thoughts and mumbled,

"Yeah, it does..." Mac frowned for a moment and reached with his right hand for his forehead.

"You should have let them take you the hospital as well..." Stella stated, causing the frown on Mac's face to deepen.

"Nah, I'm okay, Stella, really..." He said in response, despite the quite bad headache, which was already forming in his skull.

_Tbc_

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_**A/N:**__ Well, I know this was rather short, but well - I promise, the next chapter will be longer! Anyways, I really hope you liked this so far. Please let me know what ya think!_


	2. Fear

_**A/N:**__ I'm sorry that it took so long, but here's finally the next chapter. Well, before I gonna let you read the update I wanted to emphasize one thing for another time - this is a __**Flangell**__-story!_

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**Complicated**

_2. Fear_

Pacing up and down the hallway at the hospital Mac tried to figure out how this entire thing had been able to go wrong like this, however, all he could think about was that it was his fault. He wasn't even quite sure yet why he felt this guilty, but he felt nonetheless responsible for the fact that Flack had been injured - and besides the reason didn't really matter anyways, at least not to him.

Watching Mac pacing around Stella frowned and let out a heavy sigh. This entire situation was so goddamn frustrating! Normally they would currently be looking for evidence at the warehouse, they would be trying to find out who had placed the bomb there instead of just waiting at the hospital. Sure, it wasn't like they didn't want to be there when Flack got out of surgery, but considering the fact that there was not really anything they could do at the hospital their main priority would normally be to focus on their job, do something useful and all. However, this time it was different - there was nothing "normal" about the current situation...

After the Fire Department had finally managed to put out the fire they had been told that someone would have to first examine the damage of the building before anyone could enter the warehouse. Therefore they had decided to head to the hospital, none of them really feeling like waiting at the lab, killing time with paperwork or going through the already examined evidence.

As Mac passed her again Stella rose from her chair and got a hold of his shoulders, causing her friend to stop and look at her, a puzzled expression on his face.

"Listen Mac, it's not gonna speed things up if you keep pacing around." Stella told him.

At that he frowned angrily and pointed out,

"I can't just sit here doing nothing!"

"Mac, either you take a seat now or you leave. Get some rest, or grab a bite to eat, go back to the lab and take another look at the evidence...I don't care what you do, but for Christ's sake - _**stop **_pacing around like that! You're driving me completely crazy!" Stella retorted and they locked eyes for a moment.

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As she finally had reached the hospital Angell closed simply her eyes for a moment, taking some deep breaths in an attempt to calm her racing mind at least a bit. She had practically ignored every speed-limit and stoplight after she had gotten Stella's call, unable to think about anything else but the fact that Flack had been injured.

Eventually turning off the engine she let out a heavy sigh and took a look at her reflection in the rearview-mirror. All through the rest of the drive she had fought back her tears, not willing to let herself lose it - despite the fact that she still couldn't deal with the thought of Flack being in a hospital.

She just wasn't the type who showed her emotions like that, she didn't want the CSIs to try to comfort her by telling her that everything was gonna be okay, that Flack was going to be alright...For Christ's sake all through her life she had barely cried, well beside the time after her mother's death, and she had no intention to lose her composure in front of the people she worked with. And even more important she knew that if he could Flack would tell her that she shouldn't cry, that she had no reason for getting this worked up about it - probably he would even joke and tell her that she won't get rid of him that easily or something comparable.

At that thought a sad smirk crossed her face for about a split second before she got finally out of her car and headed for the entrance of the hospital.

Entering the building and walking up to the reception Angell got aware of just how scared she was. As she had reached the reception she took a deep breath and forced herself to say,

"Excuse me, I'm looking for Detective Donald Flack..."

A young nurse nodded slightly and told her while getting up,

"He's currently still in surgery, but I'll show you the way to the waiting area..."

"Thanks." Angell stated, a tiny smile on her face.

It somehow calmed her slightly to know that Flack was still in surgery, since that meant that he was alive, though at the same time it also worried her.

As they had reached the right floor the nurse stopped and gestured to the left before leaving to get back to the reception, while Angell headed into the direction the nurse had pointed in.

Only a moment later she caught sight of Mac and Stella and increased her pace. She had barely reached them when she already inquired,

"How is he?"

Hearing her voice the two CSIs turned to look at her and Stella approached her.

"He's still in surgery, no word yet..." She told Angell.

She nodded slightly, and after a moment of silence she asked,

"How bad is it?"

At that question Mac and Stella exchanged a look, then Stella replied,

"It's quite serious, but he's tough...He'll be okay..."

Angell closed her eyes, trying to fight back the tears that threatened to break eventually free. Opening them again she wanted to know,

"What happened?"

"We wanted to arrest several suspects at a warehouse, which they used as drug-lab. Just as we had cuffed the three suspects someone from the SWAT team found a bomb...It went off before Flack and two guys from SWAT were able to get out of the warehouse..."

Listening to what Stella was telling her Angell got eventually overwhelmed by her emotions and the tears broke free, causing Stella to trail off and pull her into a tight embrace.

_Tbc_

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_**A/N:**__ Thanks for reading, hope you liked it! I'm sorry that the update turned out this short - especially since I let you wait for son long...I'll try to update soon again, though I don't know when exactly that will be. In the meantime, please do me a favor and REVIEW!_


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